Life in an OT

The first thing that came to my mind looking at the operation table where I was to be operated upon, was to pray and hope that I don’t fall off that table during the procedure for it was small and inadequate to take my body size.

Then came those planks attached to the operation table to rest my arms on and it instantly reminded of a certain shades of grey and activities associated with it.

Lo and behold!! As I lay on the table the nurse (male) started tapping/hitting my arms to find an elusive good vein (his term not mine) which was hidden under the layers of fat and shaved patches of my dark skin.

With a gown that I didn’t fit into, arm planks, hitting and needling, if I ever wanted a BDSM it seemed it was coming true on this very operation table.

Then comes the masked up amiable anesthetist who asks me if I have any vices/ addiction. I was wondering की आज इस टेबल पर surgery होगी या मेरे को therapy दी जायेगी. The list of vices and addiction was long and the thing that tops the list is over thinking and manifesting the worst case scenario in my life. बहराल यह सब तो बता न पाया उनको.

As he went about injecting the required doses of anesthesia he asked me my favorite actor and I said it is The Badshah of Bollywood (naa I didn’t get that dramatic) Mr. SRK and then he asked my favorite actor female. In that few milliseconds faces and names came rolled in my front of my eyes and in order not to breach public order/ decency and outraging my modesty (of whatever was left) on the operation table I said Alia Bhatt (Kapoor बोलना ज़रूरी तो नहीं है ना?).

The last thing I remember before I woke up on the other side of the surgery was him asking me to think of Alia Bhatt. I am still wondering whether the anesthetist had asked me to engage in emotional infidelity in order to achieve his professional goals?

Or maybe its the case of what happens on the Operation Theatre stays in the Operation Theatre!!

BTW I am all sorted now other than my cycling and trekking which is to be avoided I am up to anything you got to offer!!

Jab Harry Met Sejal

Shah-Rukh-KhanmThe movie had all the factors working favourably for it,from The Shahrukh Khan to Imtiaz Ali- the master storyteller of seamless real Love Stories and the Talented Ms. Anushka Sharma and this amazing movie title copied from one my favourites rom-com When Harry Met Sally.

So with all the above expectation and much more we enter the Cinema Hall for a 10:00 AM show tagging along a friend and his wife who was watching a movie in a Cinema Hall after a gap of 10 years.

The story goes something like this a Gujju Girl loses her engagement Ring while on a trip with her fiancé and family and to search that she stays back all alone in Europe and to help her is the very Dashing Tour Guide Shahrukh. So basically they go back to all the possible places where Ms. Sejal could have dropped this family heirloom ring and it isn’t surprising to get the plot after this.

anushka-sharma_640x480_41497627410This was what used to be the USP of Imtiaz Ali to tell a simple love story in an unconventional way. Sadly there isn’t anything new/unconventional to the plot/treatment and after the initial fun journey the movie loses steam and novelty as it reaches intermission. We have seen the foreign locations dime a dozen times in previous movies. The songs that are integral to an Imtiaz’s film seemed forced and are completely forgettable.

Shahrukh is brilliant is always playing a Punjabi Tour Guide in Europe. There is no one and I say no one in the Hindi Film Industrysrk-aunshka-sharma who can romance a girl the way he does. .His eyes speak a thousand emotions but then if only the movie could match up to that. Now at 51 years old and 25 years since playing the quintessential romantic lead we want more from him to be entertained. What he seriously needs now is Karan Johar to direct him in a mature love story. I miss their pairing I mean just as an Actor-Director (don’t get ideas in your head).

Anushka-Sharma-Jab-Harry-Met-Sejal-Fashion1Anushka plays the pitch perfect Gujarati Girl with her accent and attitude but to bear this during the entire length of the film like in real life gets on your nerves. The initial interactions between her and Shahrukh are genuinely funny but then alas that’s just initially!!

In the end this movies feels like been there and done that. In search of the ring the team loses the plot and the audience attention and we cinemagoers our ticket money !!

Unrequited Love


आज १४ फ़रवरी को वैलेंटाइन डे बनाने वालों में से मैं खुद तो बिलकुल नहीं हूँ, लेकिन जो मानते हैं या मानते थे या मनाने का सोचते है व् उन सब के लिए जिनका इश्क क़ामिल न हो पाया उनके लिए मशहूर शायर साहिर लुधयानवी की नज़्म – ‘मता-ए-ग़ैर’ शेयर कर रहा हूँ.

जैसा की शाहरुख खान ने – ऐ दिल है मुश्किल में कहा है, “एक तरफ़ा पयार की ताक़त ही कुछ और होती है ….. औरों के रिश्तों के तरह यह दो लोगों में नहीं बटती….. सिर्फ मेरा हक है इस्पे”



मेरे ख़्वाबों के झरोकों को सजाने वाली, तेरे ख़्वाबों में कहीं मेरा गुज़र है कि नहीं,

पूछ कर अपनी निगाहों से बता दे मुझ को, मेरी रातों के मुक़द्दर में सहर है कि नहीं..

चार दिन की ये रिफ़ाक़त जो रिफ़ाक़त भी नहीं,  उम्र भर के लिए आज़ार हुई जाती है,

ज़िंदगी यूँ तो हमेशा से परेशान सी थी,  अब तो हर साँस गिराँ-बार हुई जाती है….

मेरी उजड़ी हुई नींदों के शबिस्तानों में,  तू किसी ख़्वाब के पैकर की तरह आई है,

कभी अपनी सी कभी ग़ैर नज़र आई है,  कभी इख़्लास की मूरत कभी हरजाई है…

प्यार पर बस तो नहीं है मिरा लेकिन फिर भी,  तू बता दे कि तुझे प्यार करूँ या न करूँ,

तू ने ख़ुद अपने तबस्सुम से जगाया है जिन्हें,  उन तमन्नाओं का इज़हार करूँ या न करूँ…

तू किसी और के दामन की कली है लेकिन,  मेरी रातें तिरी ख़ुश्बू से बसी रहती हैं,

तू कहीं भी हो तिरे फूल से आरिज़ की क़सम,  तेरी पलकें मिरी आँखों पे झुकी रहती हैं….

तेरे हाथों की हरारत तिरे साँसों की महक,  तैरती रहती है एहसास की पहनाई में,

ढूँडती रहती हैं तख़्ईल की बाँहें तुझ को,  सर्द रातों की सुलगती हुई तन्हाई में….

तेरा अंदाज़-ए-करम एक हक़ीक़त है मगर, ये हक़ीक़त भी हक़ीक़त में फ़साना ही न हो,

तेरी मानूस निगाहों का ये मोहतात पयाम, दिल के ख़ूँ करने का एक और बहाना ही न हो ….

कौन जाने मिरे इमरोज़ का फ़र्दा क्या है, क़ुर्बतें बढ़ के पशेमान भी हो जाती हैं,

दिल के दामन से लिपटती हुई रंगीं नज़रें, देखते देखते अंजान भी हो जाती हैं…

मेरी दरमांदा जवानी की तमन्नाओं के, मुज़्महिल ख़्वाब की ताबीर बता दे मुझ को,

मेरा हासिल मेरी तक़दीर बता दे मुझ को……

Disclaimer: This has nothing to do with me or any resemblance to any person dead or alive that I may have known or know, so no post-mortems required.



This film is about the rise of a Robinhoodesque benevolent bootlegger from Gujarat, a celebration of the anti hero who finally succumbs to his deeds. Bootlegging is the worst kept secret of the only state in India which in papers is supposed to practice absolute Prohibition. This movie is about the nexus of the Bootelegger-Neta-Police-Consumer.

With a running time of around 144 min this one is fast paced, with great screenplay and has crisp and full on dialoguebaazi. What could have been definitely better was the music which kind of slows the pace and in some places feel forced, well the one wherein Ms. Leone features is definitely not the one I am talking about for that is for keeps.

Nawazuddin is brilliant as upright police officer who is perennially on the trail of Raees with his cat and mouse chase. Mohd. Zeeshan Ayyub who like his previous outings once again plays his brilliant supporting role. Mahira Khan is good but had nothing much to offer to be what our Indian actress couldn’t deliver.

raeesAfter the recent duds and becoming a kind of hate icon by the right wingers for his frank statements, SRK blows us with this amazing movie. It has the authentic feel of the period and the setting. It is like he is trying to prove a point to his detractors and he is successful in doing so. The whistles and the claps on his entry and dialogues proves he has a loyal fan base that includes me.

So like Raees says “दिन और रात तो लोगों के होते हैं, शेरों का तो ज़माना होता है”, go watch this movie because some bad Fridays don’t unmake a BADSHAH !!